Photograph: Daniella K
Acknowledging a problem openly, and particularly acknowledging it to someone who has a very informed understanding of such issues, is perhaps the most important step toward acceptance.
Commonly when people reveal such a personal aspect of their experience, they may learn that many others have felt or reacted in a similar way. They may learn that many others have successfully addressed such difficulties. They might find themselves sitting opposite someone who has a deep and genuine appreciation of the nature of their difficulties, yet clearly remains optimistic about their prospects of overcoming them.
When clients have the experience of being understood and accepted despite revealing something about themselves that they might have found wanting or shameful, they commonly experience greater hope.
The experience of standing back from a problem and gaining an increased understanding of it with a therapist’s help can shift a burden from feeling potentially insurmountable to a set of circumstances that might be actively addressed in some way, even though the path of recovery may not be clear at first. Once someone is able to accept themselves having a particular problem, and has reduced their sense of shame associated with having it, the practical steps for best addressing the first problem more readily unfold. At that point, the first problem has become a lesser one.
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